Honestly.

Once:

I can still remember the words and what they meant, as we etched them with our fingers in years of wet cement. The days blurred into each other, though everything seemed clear. We cruised along at half speed, but then we shifted gears.

Now:

We ran like vampires from a thousand burning suns, but even then we should have stayed. But we ran away.
Now all my friends gone. Maybe we’ve outgrown all the things that we once loved. Runaway! But what are we running from? A show of hands from those in this audience of one. Where have they gone?

Beware of Bear

we are lighting matches just to watch them burn.

"Watch the matches. Turn to ashes.

I could tell as you turned.

I smelled the sulfur so clear.

And fire's a beautiful sound"

i am not so good at what I do.

i am not so good.

i am again to be the kid with the chemicals. ("I think he said to meet him here but I'm not sure")

i carry death on my back with my own world between my ears.

who will keep me company?

who will keep me . . .

Thank You for the Venom

I wouldn't front the scene if you paid me

I'm just the way that the doctor made me

On and on and on and on.

You'll never make me leave
I wear this on my sleeve
Give me a reason to believe

So give me all your poison
And give me all your pills
And give me all your hopeless hearts
And make me ill

I'm running after something that I'll never kill . . .

. . . And so you see, I used to blog when I was lonely. I used to pretend that I wanted someone to notice me, but "no one even knew, it was really only you." But now I'm not lonely anymore, and I almost don't know what to do with myself. I am happy. I really am.

Right now I'm going to sleep on couch because that's the sort of adventure that I could do with at the moment.

Trivia: To create and anti venom, you have use the original venom from the snake.

Who I am Hates Who I've Been

Sometimes I fear I will be rescued from this bored life . . .

And then I found out that even after all of the things that I am not, I still am. As the man said, I think therefor I am. You cannot argue with logic like that.

And I remember the partridge in a pear tree.

Time consumer, time consuming, time consume me.

After all that has been said of Mice and men, are none of us agents?

Where is the fiery fire? Scream loud, scream sianara, sweet Josephine, will you follow me home? But I cannot follow the wanderings of Claudio. I do not have the super-secret codex.

And thus I muse my useless musing as one in the morning. Good night, Seattle.

Istanbul was Konstantinople

Even old New York once New Amsterdam. Why the changed it, I can't say. People just liked it better that way. So take me back to Konstantinople, no you can't go back to Konstantinople. Been a long time gone, Konstantinople. Why did Konstantinople get the works? That's nobody's business bu the Turks.

. . .

Every gall in Constantinople

Lives in Istanbul, not Constantinople

So if you've a date in Constantinople

She'll be waiting in Istanbul

. . .

There's a picture opposite me

Of my primitive ancestry

Which stood on a rocky shores and kept the beached shipwreck free

Thought I respect that a lot

I'd be fired if that was my job

After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts

It's been a big day for those I know

Today La Nena finally set sail. It will be a long voyage there and back, may she be more sea worthy than she appears.

Columbus got his long deserved promotion and proudly bares the tile of captain, though he will likely be in dry dock for quite some time. While Jude Law flounders in a storm of papers.

All will be well. All is well.

"Everything, It Must Belong Somewhere"

This is, as has been said, the first day of the rest of my life. The rest of my life being defined as the part of my life starting with today. It will be busy, I suspect.

Let the past stay there, I say. The lake should not be dragged unnecessarily.

Leave the bright blue door on the whitewashed wall

Leave the death ledger under city hall
Leave the joyful air in that rubber ball today

Just leave the lilac print on the linen sheet
Leave the birds you killed at your father's feet
Let the sideways rain in the crooked street remain

Leave the whimpering dog in his cold kennel
Leave the dead starlet on her pedestal
Leave the acid kids in their green fishbowls today

Leave the sad guitar in its hardshell case
Leave the worried look on your lover's face
Let the orange embers in the fireplace remain

Leave the ocean's roar in the turquoise shell
Leave the widower in his private hell
Leave the liberty in that broken bell today

Just leave the epic poem on its yellowed page
Leave the gray macaw in his covered cage
Let the traveling band on the interstate remain

Leave the secret talks on the trundle bed
Leave the garden tools in that rusted shed
Leave those bad ideas in your troubled head today

Just leave the restless ghost in his old hotel
Leave the homeless man in that cardboard cell
Let the painted horse on the carousel remain

Leave the old town drunk on his wooden stool
Leave the autumn leaves in their swimming pool
Leave the poor black child in his crumbling school today

Leave the novelist in his daydream tune
Leave the scientist in her Rubik's cube
Let the true genius in the padded room remain

Leave the horse's hair on the slanted bow
Leave the slot machines on the riverboat
Leave the cauliflower in the casserole today

Just leave the hot bright trash in the shopping malls
Leave the hawks of war in their capitols
Let the organ's moan in the cathedral remain

In truth the forest hears each sound
Each blade of grass as it lies down
The world requires no audience
No witnesses, no witnesses

But I do.

Alone, I am not.

Like Schrödinger's quantum mechanics I don't exist if I'm not observed.